A horrible Warning?

There is nothing more insightful and eyeopening then hearing another person's strugle with their family life, to bring your own lot in life into perspcetive. I realized today that yes I'm upset that I haven't gotten pregnant yet. And yes I'm upset that my sister just had her 4th child and neither my sister nor her husband have a full time job or the intention of getting one. They would rather keep living off his mother and keep going to school. School being the only thing they truly worry about. So I realized that I had my prorities backward on all this I sat their and realized that I cannot change the fact that my sister is choosing this lot in life for her children but something in this life will make these kids who they are tomorow. It may be something good it maybe something ho-hum but they will go on to have children and something GREAT could come from them too. I can't sit here screaming and crying that she isn't the mother that I would be if I had her kids. I can't fight about what Farmer would do in M.'s (brother in law) situation. I can only take this in stride and DEAL with it. It has happened there is nothing that can be changed or fixed. These kids are here for a reason. And K. and M. won't listen to a damn thing I say to change it. So I must deal with that. I feel like I just opened my eyes for the first time to all of this. The light hurts but in time I can adjust... Maybe... I might just need to close them again and go back to sleep. I hate that I have to watch my sister make a mess of her life and her relationships. But I see this as something that I won't let myself do. I think of what Cathrine Aird always said: "If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning."
I think my sister has done this for me...