August

I have been MIA for over a month now. I suddenly got struck with a severe allergic reaction to blogging. Not sure why. But I avoided writing at all costs!! I really can't explain why I get into ruts like this but I do. So before I let a whole month slip away with out blogging I'm going to do a month in review....

The last week of July Mama Farmer was told before she did more chemo she would need to have a round of immunity boosting shoots. So from the 1st of August through the 4th she got shots to help build her immunity. On the 6th she had to have more fluid drained from her abdomen. Poor gal has been having anywhere from 7 to 9 liters drained each week. It's become her Friday afternoon ritual.

On August 10th was our monthly Book Club meeting. Which I was hosting this time around. We ended up having a record amount of attendees. Which was awesome because it was our 1 year anniversary!! It was quite exciting seeing how big we had grown in a years time. The book we discussed was my pick. I was actually a little disappointed. I chose: Eat, Pray, Love By: Elizabeth Gilbert. I chose it mostly because the movie was going to be coming out 3 or 4 days after our meeting. It was a very hard book for me to get through. I was not impressed! I actually liked the movie more then the book. I think that's the first time I have ever been able to say that. But anyway check out the movie it was great. The book club went as a group to a matinee on the following Saturday. It was a blast seeing it together because we all were laughing at the same times and whispering to each other when we thought something would have looked different in the movie. We meet for lunch at a great little downtown cafe. It was a wonderful book club meeting and Saturday lunch date.

August 13th Mama Farmer had to have another 9 liters drained... The doctors are beginning to be more and more concerned with the amount of fluid she is creating. So they have decide to put off doing Chemo till her strength returns and hopefully the liver will cut back on creating so much excess fluid...

The next week was actually pretty uneventful except for my weekly exercise class. Back in July my mama literally begged me to take a Zumba class with her. She is always looking for something for "Us" to do together. So we can bond.... I don't know if you all know this but my mother drives me batty!! But I knew she wouldn't let up unless I just gave in and went with her. So I did and no I have a new obsession!!!! Zumba !!!!! Oh my goodness if you don't know what this is you need to run to your local gym and beg for them to start it!!! I also thought that if I went to this class with my mom I would be able to spend time with her, without "spending" time with her. If you get my drift!! :) I have been working really hard and diet and exercise this past month. I'm going to the gym for Zumba 2 to 3 days a week. I haven't lost any lbs but I know I'm losing serious inches!!! My arms and legs are getting so toned!! I can't believe it!!! And now I don't feel guilty for ever seeing my mother... And we are sooo busy working out she can't say anything snarky!!! I only have to listen to her snarkiness walking into class and walking out! How about them apples?

August 18th and 19th I had my yearly meltdown... The one where I am reminded at how old my ovaries are going to be on the 20th of August. Last year I had a melt down at work when I came back from lunch and my office had a surprise birthday party for me. They had cake, ice cream, balloons, flowers, the works! Yes I know you probably think I'm to young to have birthday melt downs! But I always thought I would have had all my kiddos by now and my hubby and I would just be happy raising toddlers in to happy children... Not trying to deal with the fact that I may never be a parent... So this year I took the dreaded day off so as to avoid any surprises. Side note: Tears and snot don't look very nice on pastel cake icing
I had planned on spending the whole day with my hubby hauling grain and not letting my brain wonder to "the Dark side." But my mother being the wonderful mother that she is. Had other plans!! My mom planned a lunch date for me, mom, dad my aunt (my godmother) Aka Mrs. Fertile Mertyle and 3 of her 11 children. She has never had a multiple these are all singletons!! She is a wonderful mother! She is a stay at home mom. My uncle has a wonderful job. But of all people for my mother to surprise me with this is the woman! I got to spend the one day that is the darkest for me staring back at her with watching my sweet little cousin cuddle in her lap. And knowing if she wanted to she could have one more... Yes these are the woman in my family the ones that say I'm ready for another one... 9 months later they have a beautiful baby bundle in their arms. I am the 2nd oldest grandchild of 42 grandchildren!!! This number does not include any great grand babies! My mom's side of the family is huge and it's so frustrating because every female is fertile but me!!!
So I sit at my surprise birthday luncheon trying to enjoy myself and I do for the most part. But sometimes my heart burns being around the woman on mom's side. Because they are all blissfully ignorant of the pain associated with being reproductively challenged. I thanked her profusely for driving up with the kiddos and and spending time with me on my birthday. This aunt is actually closer in age to me then she is to my mother. When I was younger we were quite close. She was just like an older sister to me and my sister.
By the time I had gotten home I was so emotionally drained. I had wanted to avoid all subjects pertaining to pregnancy, birth, babies, children, etc. on my Birthday and instead I was exposed to lethal does of all the above. I was so blue by the time Hubby came home I didn't want to celebrate anymore! But he wanted to take me shopping for my birthday present. I had it in my head that I was going to get an e-reader. I've been drooling over them for awhile now!! And so we drive the hour down to the biggest town around to look them over. And I talk myself out of all of the ones at bes.t buy because they were CRAPPY!!! And me being the tech savvy that I am didn't realize that the only place they had the k.indle was at Ta.rget!! Am I the only one who didn't know that? So we run over to the Ta.rget. To get my Birthday present and guess what? They didn't have ANY!!! And it will be several weeks before they do be cause the new version has just come out!! Just my Luck!! So not only did I not get to do what I wanted for my birthday, I had to suffer through all the questions I cannot stand and then I didn't even get the present that I wanted!!! All I wanted was a day for ME!! Was that to much to ask for?

After the birthday fiasco I had a somewhat quiet week at work. And then we actually got Mama Farmer talked into a little trip with her 2 besties to the French Lick Spa!! We didn't think we were going to get her to go. She changed her mind a half a dozen times before they actually picked her up. She thought she would get sick while she was there or the food wouldn't agree with her. But nothing bad happened. The food all agreed with her and she had a blast with her girlfriends! They got the works done. (As much as she could participate in considering her health) I tell you though, she looked like a different woman when she came home! She was literally glowing Sunday afternoon! I really think it boosted her morale. We all have tried so hard to help her and to be there for her. We have tried everything in our arsenal to cheer her up and to help her feel better. But I guess there are just some things that only your girlfriends can do...

That my friends if you are still here and made it this far was my month... I hate that I have been so lax in writing. I'm hoping to remedy that! I plan on doing a blog kick in the pants! So stay tuned.

Love & Hugs to you all!!