Perks of the Job

I had a sucky morning at work. I just really couldn't seem to do a damn thing right. Everything I touched just fell apart at my finger tips. And then I ran to meet a friend of mine for lunch and when I came back to my office I found this...





Yes that is a box from Godiva Chocolatier





And this is a letter telling me how much they appreciate my business. And how they are hoping to help me again with my gift giving needs... I had ordered quite a few gifts for some of my sales reps from them last Christmas. And of course everyone loved them.





This is just tissue paper but I thought it might add to the mystique of the package.





What the HELL? Why is it soo small? That's a big box for not a lot of chocolate!!!





This is a reusable Ice Pack from Godiva!! How cool is that?





Mmmmm Belgian Chocolate!!!! Me Likey!!!





And yes there is a heart!!! Am I seeing a theme here?

So yes after that rough of a morning its nice to sit down here at home and send myself into a sugar coma!!!

This weekend

Well I have an update of sorts on little S the girl I wrote about here
She has been found. Her mother had abandoned her. But now she is in the custody of her grandparents. Thank You Lord!!! We found this out last night from my hubbs cousin. They really think she will be happier now. I can't imagine what had happened and her mother ought to be thrown in jail for life. But I don't think they even know where she is. Oh and the kicker is this women had another child that was an infant and she left it with a friend of hers to raise!!! WTH?!! I'm just glad that S will be taken care of and will not have to survive on her own any more and is in a home of people who love her and will protect her.

Our weekend went well the weather was beautiful!! I worked on getting the porches decorated for fall. One of the perks of living in a farming community is that you can always "borrow" melons, pumpkins, corn you name it we swap for it. Usually Mr. Farmer gets called out by the local farmers to come and fix equipment or to advise on broken tractors etc. Hubby has been a tractor mechanic for years. He loves tinkering on anything with a motor. As long as its not a chevy that is... :) He is a tad partial to Fords. Anyway hubs took me to one of our neighbors pumpkin fields to get pumpkins cause I have been hounding him for a week to bring some home when he ran by there... But this way I got to pick my own. We had about 14 mama jama pumpkins in the bed of that truck. They are just gorgeous this year. There is just something about fall that just stirs me up inside. I love the falling leaves and the colors and the crisp air. I just love love love fall! I love getting to wear my sweaters and boots! Riding in the combine with my honey. Having bon fires and roasting marshmallows. Mmmm I just love fall!! I took some pictures too. I have to tell you I'm addicted to hearts. I collect them and if its cool and unusual I will buy the item that is covered in hearts, is a heart or what have you. Saturday I was grocery shopping and found a huge container of gourds which I usually buy a few for decorations. So I start digging in this bin for the best gourds and I find myself a little gourd that had a heart!! It was so unusual!!!




I'll post some pictures of the pumpkins we got last night later. For now I will show you a pic of my favorite flower/bush thingy that is in my front yard. I have no idea what the name is but I have 5 of them and they are huge. And the butterflies love them!!! The flowers are just covered in butterflies throughout the day.




Oh and if your wondering if my body has reacted badly to the prometrium!!! I will have to tell you that is hasn't!! I can't believe it!!! I'm actually on double the dose I have usually been on in the past. But this time around I haven't had the bloating, nor the severe cramps, headaches, nausea. I really think its because of the acupuncture. That is the only thing I have done differently since the last prometrium induced period which was Jan of 2009. So I highly recommend acupuncture!! I have my appointment with Beth the most wonderful acupuncturist in the world this afternoon!! You all will think this is terrible of me. But at my RE appt last Thursday I completely forgot to bring up the fact that I had been going to acu for the past 6 months. I got brain freeze when they told me I was going to have to have an HSG and he wanted me to start inject ables. I wasn't able to think properly after that. But the sad thing is that it wasn't until this morning while washing my hair that I had remembered that I didn't tell him about how I wanted to keep seeing her... Which I really highly doubt it will be a problem this cycle anyway because we aren't officially "trying" this time around. But anyway I guess I'll just tell her to stick me where it will make aunt flow's visit more imminent and skip the traditional Chinese herbs. Oh and the RE recommended that I start taking a baby aspirin and 1000mg of Folic acid along with my prenatal vit. So that might be helping with the lack of side effects. But I'm not sure.

Oh and I'm going to leave you with a couple more pics I took last night. Of my puppies and hubby. My fur kids love watermelon and this will probably be the last melon of the season since we have mowed them all down and plowed the field. We kept several for the kids and this is the last one we had.


Daddy Farmer, Buddy & Maggie



Maggie



Buddy

1 down!! How many more to go?

Well we did it!!! We survived our first official appointment!! It was nerve racking and I was tongue tied the whole time. I didn't get my vay jay jay checked out though. She was all ready too!!! Oh well I guess next time... :) I was right about the questions. I never did think of any except: "what are the clinic’s success rates?" The rest he and his Nurse Practitioner covered before I even thought of them. I felt like I was learning how to juggle in a circus. They just kept handing us papers and then would bring out another stack and circle things then slide it across the table and go at it again. It was exhilarating and frightening all at one time. I know Farmer is worried about the cost of everything. But I think once we get all the crops in he really won’t mind at all. This is always panic season for him. Especially if more then 80% of our crops are still in the ground. But really the timing couldn't’t be better.

Dr. B and NP G. are AWESOME!!!! I LOVE them already. They are a little kooky but I think it’s a good thing. First off the list Dr. B said he was going to give me my favorite drug of all: Prometrium at 200mg twice a day for 5 days at bedtime. Then he said get a SA for hubbs. Which I don’t think he was too thrilled about considering: “She is the one with the problem.” But then NP G. said “Well it would end up being a total waste of money to have all the tests done on Mrs. Farmer and buy all the meds for this protocol then get started and then find out your swimmers weren’t swimming…” Bingo!! That did it!! I saw the light bulb go off. Then Dr. B. said we would need to get Mrs. Farmer set up for an HSG. And then on the 1st cycle (When your ready) we will start with Gonal-F so we can do a total of 3 rounds on that before they would move us on. At this point at his office it looks like for one round it will cost $2,595.00 I’m not sure how this compares around the country. I thought it was a pretty good price. Here is the breakdown.
Meds $1,000.00 (average)
Initial u/s (med check) = $245
Monitoring us & b/w (mid cycle check) = $500 each
(Unknown number depending upon how quickly I respond to meds)
Progesterone check (u/s b/w) = $350

I will be paying all this out of pocket pretty much because my insurance has NO coverage for any fertility treatments, testing etc. The lady in the financial office said that they a lot of times can get the HSG covered and the initial u/s and some blood work covered by my insurance but it can get pretty sticky. So here we go!!! No turning back now!!!

Welcome ICLW’ers I look forward to visiting you all!!!



P.S. I’m soo sorry I haven’t been able to comment or even really read blogs this week because the phone lines at my home have been screwy!! Hopefully I will have Internet this weekend and I can catch up on reading!! It’s so hard to read at work or write for that matter. Just thought I would let everyone know that I’m not ignoring you all I MISS you VERY MUCH!!!!

Weird Morning

We had a strange little thing happen to us in the last 24 hours. Well as I’m sure most of you know we live out in the country, in a rural area where a lot of large families have lived for generations. So with that being said we have no less than 8 families on our road alone that have the same last name as farmer and I. So it tends to be a bit confusing when it comes to mail, UPS and Fed-ex and just plain giving directions.

So last night after work I ran to the grocery store and so I got home later than normal. I put all the food away and headed out the side door to the barn to see what Farmer boy wanted for supper. When I opened the door a business card fluttered to the floor. It was the business card of a family case manager, For the Indiana Dept. of Child Services!!! WTF? We were a little worried. The gentleman who left the card wrote on the front: Please call me!! ASAP!!! Well of course we called. But the office was closed so we sat around all evening debating what we were wanted for. I teased Farmer boy about his wild youth catching up to him in the form of a bunch of little ones. He kept trying to say if that’s true those women would have had their hands out long ago!! But I think he was still worried about it. My husband wasn’t the quiet, homebody farmer in his younger days as he is now. He has sown his fair share of wild oats. I wasn’t too worried about it as the night went on, cause I figured if it was important they wouldn’t have left a card in the door.
Fast forward to this morning I called the number a little after 8:00am and got the gentleman who left his card in our door. He asked if I knew a young woman by the name of D_____ ( same last name as Farmer and I). I said no but I have only been married to my hubs for a couple years and I don’t really know his extended family very well . And then he asked is S, living with you? I said no we have no children. He said so D’s daughter S is not living with you? And I said no! Then he went in to the rig a ma roll of how he saw Farmer boy’s name on the mail box and it matched the last name of the little girl he is looking for!!! I said is she is missing? Then he said S and our last name all together and I remembered who the little girl was but I had only met her once. She is a cousin of a cousin living in a bad situation with a mother who doesn’t love her and I almost think she resents the little girl. S is 12 years old and her mother isn’t with S’s father so I guess that’s part of the whole resentment. But getting back to the story… I said I think I know who you are talking about. I asked: is she in danger? And he said he doesn’t know he has been trying to track her mother and S down and can’t seem to find them. The address D gave him led them to a corn field on our property by way of GPS… And so he thought maybe S was living with us since we share the same last name. I said no I had only met the little girl once. She was with her grandparents. She seemed happy with them I told him. He then asked me who they were and I told him there names. And then I gave him the directions to the house the little girl and her mother supposedly lived in. Which also on our road just a couple miles north of us. After I told him what the house looked like he said he thinks he remembered seeing it. So I told him I would call him back when I left for work to give him the house address (for his GPS). When I headed out for work I drove down to the little house and the numbers and name had been freshly removed. I could still see the sticky stuff on the mailbox. So I called him back and told him the numbers weren’t on the box anymore. And then I told him the color of the house and shutters. Then he thanked me for my help and I hung up.

When I got off the phone I felt so sorry for S. but I’m happy that maybe she is going to get some attention on this matter. I have heard through the grapevine that her situation is terrible. But when her grandparents can wrangler her away she loves being with them. So maybe this will actually work out in her favor. I feel so conflicted with my wanting a child so bad and pretty much wanting to do anything possible to have a child. Then finding out that a deadbeat mother is neglecting her child right down the road from me it makes me just want to vomit. I hope that everything works out for Little S. she deserves a mama that will adore her. And I hope that maybe the state will see that her Grandmother might be the best one for the job.

I just wish all this wouldn’t have happened 2 days before my appt. I’m getting nervous about it now. The nurse called about an hour ago to remind me about my appt and to bring all my goodies that they mailed to me. Oh and I’m still not coming up with any questions to ask. I can only think of things that I think he should know about me… Like oh I’m coming up on 200 days without a period!! Or my temps are always way below 98.0 degrees but I don’t have a thyroid problem. Umm still thinking of something… I was told that at the begging of this appt we will have a meeting with their financial person and they will explain all the options and payment plans etc. I’m pretty sure that is where my questions will come up. But other than that I can’t think of anything else. So other than that I’m just waiting!!!
Oh and welcome all you fellow ICLWers!! I’m sorry this was such a long post but I had to tell someone about it. I just feel like this day has kind of been a little on the weird side.

Locks of Love

I have been thinking about how I need a new hair style for a looong time now. I have had long curly hair for the majority of my life and it suited me fine. But here recently I just felt like I was in a hair rut. I needed to do something. But I didn't know what I needed to do about it. I kept telling my stylist one of these days were going to cut it all off!! And she would laugh and say sure Mrs. Farmer. My stylist is my 1st cousin and I'm fairly close to her. So she knew I was always going to stay with my long locks just like all the women on our side of the family have. She is almost 40 and has the most amazing dark brown hair that is almost to her waist. She will usually wear in a braid and its like movie style princess hair. And then a couple weeks ago I got to thinking my hair is getting too heavy and its long and I can't do anything with it. I need to do something. But I just kept holding off. Then I was reading the blogs on my blogroll and saw this:please read


After reading it I felt so amazed at this little girl who gave so much. And I have been on this earth 20+ years more then she and I never have been this selfless. So I was going to do something I should have done many times over in the last several years of my life but never did.

I was going to give my hair to someone who could use it. Instead of letting it go into the wastebasket. I talked it over with Hubbs about a week ago. Then called the salon were my beautiful cousin works and she wasn't working. I then called everyday for about 4 days. And then one of her co workers finally said she won't be here till Friday. I was beginning to worry that maybe since she hadn't been working this week that maybe its a sign. But I wouldn't let myself think that way! I was going to cut my hair by George!!! I walked in Friday night and told her what I wanted and she about flipped out!! She didn't want to cut it. She was actually starting to make me get scared that I would look bad with short hair. She just kept saying I don't think you want to do this. This is going to be a lot of hair!! Its going to be shorter then anything you have had in ages. And I said yes its time to do it. She was so apprehensive but she was just looking out for me. She truly was worried about me. But I said just do it!! I don't care how short its going to be. Just do it!!! I had decided not to tell a soul until it was done. Farmer knew but I didn't want anyone else knowing cause I was worried I would chicken out at the last minute. But I didn't and its done now and its SOOOO short!!! But I really love it. I feel so different. I can't believe its me when I look in the mirror!!!

I think I needed this for Thursday. I feel like I'm starting anew. Who knows what I'll do next?!!





Yes I know there is a shadow but I don't have photoshop and I don't have the patience to sit in front of the camera all morning.